PUB REVIEW: The Lass O’ Richmond Hill, Richmond Park

I’ve tried to get in to this cavernous pub beside the grandest of the Royal Parks a few times now but because it’s beside the grandest of the Royal Parks it’s always RAMMED. All these no-booking policies these days have dulled my senses - I must have forgotten it is actually still possible to book a table in London in 2012. 

However I thought ahead this time and on a wet Saturday afternoon we arrived (with 2 kids in tow) and were shown to a particularly lovely table in the rear dining area. It’s a classy joint - wood panelling, nice carpets, a real cosy feel. Far posher than your average Young’s pub. It’s what you’d call ‘kid friendly’ - but that doesn’t mean the little blighters run the place, it just means they are respectfully catered for. 

We ordered drinks and tap water (they had Twickenham Brewery Naked Ladies on - an excellent hoppy brew in great nick). I think the waiter may have had a heavy night the evening before as he missed everyone’s glass leaving us with a bit of a soggy table. Other than that, service was friendly and efficient. 

Now, the Lass really bigs up its beef. The menu proclaims that they dry-age their meat on the premises, the meat comes from Macken Brothers butchers down the road in Chiswick and they’ve apparently won Great Britain’s Best Steak Pub 2011 from some nameless organisation. It better be good with such big talk…

Fortunately I was impressed. I went for ribeye and it was very good. Nice smokey char and undeniably good quality meat. They lose a point for overcooking it a bit though (I asked for medium rare and got medium. Why do so many places screw this up?) Chips were decent enough, blue cheese salad was delicious but the warm peppercorn sauce was great. It was more like a fine, rich pepper gravy. I downed the rest like a shot at the end. Don’t judge me, I’m Northern. 

Unfortunately they messed up one of my dining companions battered cod; it was completely overcooked and very dry. Boo. 

This considered I would recommend the Lass O’ Richmond hill. It’s in a top location, (you can be in Richmond Park in 2 mins), it’s a nice place to spend a few hours and they know how to cook a decent steak. OK, they ain’t going to be worrying the Hawksmoor anytime soon but they can cook up some good quality meat. It’s not cheap for a pub but the quality is there (and what do you expect in this location? Every third car is a Porsche). It’s a shame about the inconstancies in the kitchen but I’ve come to expect this from pub dining in this country unfortunately. Don’t try the fish. As Weezer said in the iconic  ‘Buddy Holly’ video, the fish is ‘not so good, Al’. 

6.5/10

The Lass O’ Richmond Hill
8 Queens Rd
Richmond
TW10 6JJ

020 8940 1306

http://www.lassorichmondhill.co.uk/

The Albany, Queens Road, Thames Ditton, Surrey

The Albany is a riverside gastropub in Thames Ditton, a curious slice of rural Surrey right on the border of Greater London. It’s a grand old building, painted in a typical shade of gastopub beige. 

First impressions weren’t good - Mrs MBFBY? rang to book a table the day before and they’d obviously cocked it up as there was no record of our booking. After a little bit of standing around feeling uncomfortable they managed to find us a table, right by the window overlooking the non-tidal Thames, no less. Lovely. 

This may be right on the edge of the capital but the clientele is PROPER Surrey. Some of the chaps looked like they’d happily spend an afternoon knocking back the single malts,  jump in the Jag and speed back to the mock-Tudor mansion without even losing their monocle. Actually, that’s a tad unfair but if you are looking to hang out with tattooed hipsters you’ve come to the wrong place. It is, however, the perfect place to come with your mother-in-law, which is what brought us here in the first place. 

It’s a handsome, airy room. Large windows with a river view, a polished stone floor and lots of wood. There’s a small bar area but The Albany is definitely more of a restaurant than a pub. The menu is quite long, the theme is modern Italian, and they do pizzas. As it was Sunday, we all decided to go for the roast. 

With trepidation I ordered the roast beef. I’ve had some seriously duff pub roasts recently. 90% of pub roasts are microwaved-to-hell rubbish and the meat treated the worst is always beef. As I’ve said before, no wonder visitors to the UK think the British can’t cook when the standard of the average pub lunch is so low. Seeing things like ‘traditional roast’ and ‘traditional fish and chips’ chalked outside a pub depresses me. I don’t want ‘traditional’. Traditionally, British food is seen as awful. We’ve moved ahead immeasurably of course and now the UK is home to some of the world’s best restaurants but most pub food is stuck firmly in the 1970s and heated by x-rays.  

Upmarket pubs in a similar vein to the Albany are guilty of crimes against roasts too. That just adds insult to injury, paying through the nose for overcooked meat and mushy veg.  Seemingly all a pub has to do these days to claim ‘gastro’ status is a lick of battleship grey paint, some mis-matched chairs and a 15 quid roast. 

The roast arrived and it certainly looked the part. I’d asked for the beef to be cooked rare (I always ask that and it hardly ever happens). I was bowled over to notice that yes, they’ve actually cooked it rare! It was a splendid bit of meat too, juicy and tender with a nice crust of crispy seasoning on the edge of the slice. The Yorkshire pud was massive, gooey inside and lightly crispy on the outside, the veg was actually cooked properly, nice and crunchy, and the roast potatoes were AMAZING. A thin, crispy skin and melt-in-the-mouth creamy insides. Some of the best roasties i’ve ever had. And as far as I could tell, none of it had been anywhere near a microwave. I accompanied my roast with a cracking pint of Youngs Bitter.

For dessert I went for a chocolate brownie with vanilla ice cream, which was massive, and pure, delicious filth. Rich, moist and plentiful - everything you could want in a brownie.

There was an offer on the menu that allowed you an extra course with your roast for 3 quid more - the roast was £12.95 so that’s 2 courses for £15.95. Really rather good value for food of this quality in a very pleasant (if a little grown-up) setting. It’s also worth mentioning that the waiting staff were super-efficiant and generally lovely. Apart from the booking cock-up at the start there was a distinct air of efficiency, despite the fact that every table was full. 

So, who’d have thought it - I’ve finally found an outstanding pub roast, and it’s a pleasant 30 minutes walk from MBFBY? towers in Surbiton (I know, it’s pretty much the law for food bloggers to live in South East London but I dance to my own beat. Not that there are any beats - this is the suburbs, UGETME)?

8/10

The Albany
Queens Road
Thames Ditton, Surrey
KT7 0QY

http://www.the-albany.co.uk/

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PUB REVIEW - The Dean Swift, Butler’s Wharf, London SE1

It’s been a tumultuous couple of months in MBFBY? world. An insane work schedule (unbelievably, writing this blog doesn’t quite pay the bills so I design and animate motion graphics ‘on the side’), a bunch of weekend commitments and major renovation work taking place at MBFBY? towers has left precious little time for the blog. I can only apologise to all 15 of you. Anyhoo, this time is almost at an end so here’s a wee pub review to ease myself back into it. 

As I mentioned above we are having MAJOR building work done on our suburban home at the moment. We thought we could stick it out but after less that a week we had no hot water, our stuff boxed away in storage and a house full of dust, scaffolding and navvies. We now don’t even have an oven (to be fair the oven door was held on by gaffer tape but is still worked, dammit). 

ANYWAY - the upside to this is that we were offered the use of a flat in SE1 so that’s where MBFBY? is living at the moment. It’s a lovely area, a mix of heavy tourist traffic by the river but plenty of quiet little cobbled streets and alleys when you head south, changing into full-on inner-city sprawl when you reach the Old Kent Rd. There are plenty of places to eat - lots of chains (there’s a Zizzi, a Pizza Express AND an Ask Pizza within 50m of each other. WHY?) , the Conran empire at Butler’s Wharf (unfortunately plagued by inconstant service and quality these days) and a scattering of pubs. 

There are a few gems round here for sure though. I spent more time and money than I care to think about in the Draft House this weekend but wasn’t in blogging mode so you’ll have to wait for a proper review. It is a cracking little boozer though with great food to match and a ridiculous selection of brews. 

However yesterday I was in blogging mode and thought I’d try out our new temporary local, the Dean Swift. This pub used to be a fairly generic sports lager-type pub (97% blokes, smelled funny, massive TVs) but inevitably has been given the modern posh-pub makeover. It’s a rather lovely job actually, understated, airy, lots of natural light and some original features such as the Victorian fireplace. It was important to get this right as the Dean Swift is rather tiny, and they’ve succeeded in creating an environment with a naturally pleasant atmosphere and plenty of places to sit, but it doesn’t feel too overcrowded. During our visit we enjoyed the easy-going, friendly vibe. The clientele seemed to be locals, the odd tourist and a scattering of students from the LSE halls next door. There’s still a telly for sport but it’s as unobtrusively located high up, and it’s not 70 inches and you don’t need 5D glasses or anything. So far, so good. And free wifi too. 

Like the Draft House, the emphasis here is on beer. They have a substantial beer list with plenty of Belgie, US and British brews to try. They’ve got 3 ales on rotation and lots of lagers on draft. My pint of Gorilla was perfectly kept. They’re one of the few places to have a BrewDog pump on the bar, too. Got to love BrewDog. If you are looking for a cheap pint then go elsewhere but it’s hardly surprising that the prices are high, it’s an upscale pub in an affluent area with a large selection of rare beers. 

We decided to have the Sunday roast as I’d been told is was good. It certainly looked the part. Unfortunately despite asking for the beef medium rare we were give overcooked, dry, chewy meat, the gravy was bland and the potatoes seemed like they’ve been sitting around for a while Boo. 12 quid, too. I should have sent it back really but:

a: the staff were really nice 

b: I’m English

The one saving grace was the Yorkshire pud. It was glorious. Crisp on the outside, gooey on the inside and it was massive. I can’t say I’m surprised the roast was a disappointment, 9 out of 10 pub roasts are. Just step away from the microwave, pub chefs. Please. No bloody wonder visitors to these fair isles still think the English can’t cook, despite the fact that the UK is home to some of the world’s best restaurants. 

We spent pretty much all day in the Dean Swift as we haven’t got wifi in the flat yet and needed to do a load of ‘errands’ online so after letting the roast go down we ordered the cheeseboard. Now this was a great success. A bit pricey at 10 quid but you got a load of quality cheese, including the frankly awesome Comté, a lovely chilli jam and assorted pickles. The thing that really blew me away here was that they actually gave us enough crackers for the cheese. Pretty much every time I have a cheeseboard they NEVER give you enough crackers. Come on. The crackers are the least expensive component. Give us more, you bloody tight-arses! I’m a simple man, I don’t ask for much. Give me enough crackers with my cheeseboard and I’m happy. 

I think the Dean Swift will have to be awarded 2 separate scores, one for the food and one for the pub. The staff deserve a shout-out here, too. Everyone was helpful, friendly and attentive without being overbearing.  It’s a cracking boozer in which it’s great to spend a relaxed afternoon supping some tasty beer from around the world. Unfortunately the roast was pretty bog standard and the meat was a travesty (especially for the price) but the cheeseboard was awesome. But still, it’s hard to screw up a cheeseboard, unless you don’t give me enough crackers of course. 

Pub experience 8/10

Food experience 5/10

The Dean Swift
10 Gainsford St
London
SE1 2NE
020 7357  0748

http://thedeanswift.com/

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